How Do I Co-parent With My Narcissist Ex?

Living with a narcissist is very difficult, and this leads to many divorces. However, if you have children with your narcissist ex, you will still need to find a way to co-parent effectively. Narcissism is not usually a valid basis for sole custody.

Thus, you will need to establish a functional parenting relationship with your ex. According to Healthline, it is good to go into the situation expecting conflict, and have solid communication plans when parenting with a narcissist.

Expect Challenging Circumstances

Generally, keep your expectations low when working with your narcissist ex. It is likely that if you go into the situation expecting a level of conflict, it will be less stressful when conflict occurs. You may also find yourself very pleased when something goes well.

Keep in mind that co-parenting is very challenging, even for parents that get along well. If your ex is a narcissist, some things will be more difficult as a matter of course.

Communication Guidelines

It is best to try and approach communicating with your ex as a job. You may wish to limit communication to email format, as it does not require an immediate response. If your ex enjoys “pressing your buttons,” do your best to keep your emotions out of the mix to avoid giving them satisfaction. Remember that you do not have to agree on everything, but you do need to work together in order to benefit your child. Never use your child as a mediator for communicating with your ex.

Working with a narcissist is very challenging, but it is possible. Remember to maintain strong boundaries and keep your emotions in check.